Experience of an Ordinary Girl

                          ARGH! Peetaaa, i love you so much :*:*:*

lama ngga cerita niih.. jadi tanggal 21 kemarin, aku diajak sama ghina untuk ngewakilin sekolah dateng ke acara Pendidikan Budaya dan Karakter Bangsa  yang di adain sama diknas gitu. aku diajak soalnya remed rapot UTSnya sedikit dan udah selesee. hehehee xD selain aku, joess juga ikut. jadi, yang ngewakilin sman 46 adalah aku, ghina sama joess. acaranya itu tanggal 22-23 mei 2013 (rabu-kamis) di TMII (Museum Listrik dan Energi Baru) jadiii setelah pulang sekolah hari rabu aku, ghiina sama joess langsung cauuuw ke TMII. Rabu, 22 Mei '13. ternyata eh ternyata di museum tsb ada 'mes' nya gitu, kita nginep di satu kamar yang kira2 isinya sekitar untuk 22 orang. tidurnya di gabung gituu sama anak2 dr sma lain. pas dateng kita isi absen gitu, terus dapet baju. nah bajunya disuruh ganti tuh pake baju yg dikasih biar seragaman semua. sekitar jam set4 kita ngumpul di auditorium untuk mulai pembukaan acaranya. pertama kita ngenalin diri gitu abis itu pembukaan dari perwakila...

Catching Fire Peeta's just pried open an oyster when I hear him give a laugh. “Hey, look at this!” He holds up a glistening, perfect pearl about the size of a pea. “You know, if you put enough pressure on coal it turns to pearls,” he says earnestly to Finnick. “No, it doesn't,” says Finnick dismissively. But I crack up, remembering that's how a clueless Effie Trinket presented us to the people of the Capitol last year, before anyone knew us. As coal pressured into pearls by our weighty existence. Beauty that arose out of pain. Peeta rinses the pearl off in the water and hands it to me. “For you.” I hold it out on my palm and examine its iridescent surface in the sunlight. Yes, I will keep it. For the few remaining hours of my life I will keep it close. This last gift from Peeta. The only one I can really accept. Perhaps it will give me strength in the final moments. “Thanks,” I say Mockingjay  I feel around for the parachute and slide my fingers inside until they...

hal. 214 Snow sudah mencurinya dariku, memelintirnya hingga tak bisa dikenal lagi, dan memberikannya padaku sebagai hadiah. [...] Sekarang, setelah Peeta dirusak musuh, baru aku bisa sepenuhnya mengharagai Peeta yang asli. Jauh lebih menghargainya daripada jika dia tewas. Kebaikannya, keteguhannya, kehangatan yang mengundang panas tak terduga dibaliknya. Selain Prum, ibuku, dan Gale, berapa banyak orang di dunia ini yang mencintaiku tanpa syarat? Kupikirkan tentang diriku, jawabannya mungkin tak ada orang lagi yang mencintaiku seperti itu. Kadang-kadang ketika aku sendirian, kuambil mutiara dari kantongku dan berusaha mengingat anak lelaki denga roti itu, dua lengan kuat yang mengenyahkan mimpi-mimpi burukku di kereta, ciuman-ciuman di arena pertarungan. Membuatku mengingat segalah hal yang hilang dalam genggamanku. Tapi apa gunanya? Semuanya musnah. Dia sudah musnah. Apapun yang ada di antara kami sudah musnah.

hal. 181 Tapi akhirnya, satu-satunya orang yang kuingnkan untuk menghiburku adalah Haymitch, karena dia juga menyayangin Peeta. Aku mengulurkan tanganku padanya dan mengucapkan sesuatu seperti namanya dan Haymitch ada di sana, memelukku dan mengusap-usap punggungku. "Tidak apa-apa. Tidak apa-apa, sweetheart." Dia mendudukanku di patahan marmer dan terus merangkulku sementara aku terisak. "Aku tak bisa melakukan ini lagi," kataku. "Aku tahu," katanya. "Yang terpikirkan olehku adalah-Apa yang dilakukannya pada Peeta-karena akulah Mockingjay!" kataku. "Aku tahu." Haymitch mempererat rangkulannya. "Kau lihatkan? bagaimana anehnya dia? Apa yang mereka lakukan padanya?" Aku berusaha mengambil napas di antara isakanku, tapi berhasil mengucapkan satu kalimat terakhir. "Ini salahku!" Kemudian aku berubah jadi histeris dan ada jarum di lenganku, lalu dunia pun lenyap.

hal. 173 Finnick menarik ujung talinya, dan ikatan yang rumit langsung menjadi tali yang lurus lagi. "Aku cuma tidak mengerti ketika aku bertemu dengan mu. Setelah Hunger Games pertamamu kupikir semua urusan asmara itu cuma akting bagimu. kami berharap kau meneruskan strategi itu. Tapi baru pada saat Peeta menghantam medan gaya dan nyaris tewas aku..." Finnick tampak ragu-ragu. Kupikir kembali kejadian di arena. Bagaimana aku menangis ketika Finnick menghidupkan Peeta kembali. Wajah bingung Finnick. Caranya menerima tingkah lakuku, menyalahkan pada kehamilan pura-puraku. "Kau apa?" "Aku salah menilaimu. Kau memang mencintainya. Aku tidak tahu dengan cara apa kau mencintainya. Mungkin kau sendiri tidak tahu. Tapi siapapun yang memerhatikanmu bisa melihat betapa kau amat menyayanginya," kata Finnick lembut. "...But anyone paying attention could see how much you care about him,” 

“Why don't you get some sleep?” he says. Because I can't handle the nightmares. Not without you, I think. ... “What are you going to do?” I ask.“Just review my notes awhile. Get a clear picture of what we're up against. But I'll go over it with you in the morning. Go to bed, Katniss,” he says. So I go to bed and, sure enough, within a few hours I awake from a nightmare where that old woman from District 4 transforms into a large rodent and gnaws on my face. I know I was screaming, but no one comes. Not Peeta, not even one of the Capitol attendants. ... Peeta rises and flips off the tape when he sees me. “Couldn't sleep?” “Not for long,” I say. I pull the robe more securely around me as I remember the old woman transforming into the rodent. “Want to talk about it?” he asks. Sometimes that can help, but I just shake my head, feeling weak that people I haven't even fought yet already haunt me. When Peeta holds out his arms, I walk straight i...

        hal. 112 Smua orang menjauh dariku-Gale, Cressida, para juru kamera-memberiku panggung. tapi aku tetap memusatkan perhatian pada lampu merah. "Aku ingin memberitahu para pemberontak bahwa aku masih hidup. Aku ada di sini di Distrik Delapan, Capitol baru saja memngebom rumah sakit yang penuh dengan laki-laki, perempuan, dan anak-anak tak bersenjata. Takkan ada korban yang selamat." Keterkejutan yang ku rasa mulai berubah jadi kemarahan. "Aku ingin memberi tahu orang-orang bahwa jika ada yang berpikir Capitol akan memperlakukan kita dengan adil dan adanya gencatan senjata, kau pasti bermimpi. Karena kau tahu siapa mereka dan apa yang mereka lakukan." Kedua tanganku langsung terangkat, seakan ingin memperlihatkan seluruh kengerian di sekelilingku. "Inilah yang mereka lakukan! Dan kita harus melawan balik!" Aku bergerak mendekati kamera sekarang, didorong oleh rasa kemarahanku. "Presiden Snow bilang dia mengirimi ku pesan? Kalau begitu, ak...

"Yang kubutuhkan adalah bunga dendelion pada musim semi. Warna kuning cerah yang berarti lahir kembali, bukannya kehancuran. Janji bahwa hidup bisa menjadi baik lagi . Dan hanya Peeta yang bisa memberiku itu. "

“Katniss, when you're in the arena,” he begins. Then he pauses. He's scowling in a way that makes me sure I've already disappointed him. “What?” I ask defensively. “You just remember who the enemy is,” Haymitch tells me. “That's all. Now go on. Get out of here.” We walk down the hallway. Peeta wants to stop by his room to shower off the makeup and meet me in a few minutes, but I won't let him. I'm certain that if a door shuts between us, it will lock and I'll have to spend the night without him . Besides, I have a shower in my room. I refuse to let go of his hand. Do we sleep? I don't know. We spend the night holding each other, in some halfway land between dreams and waking. Not talking. Both afraid to disturb the other in the hope that we'll be able to store up a few precious minutes of rest. Cinna and Portia arrive with the dawn, and I know Peeta will have to go. Tributes enter the arena alone. He gives me a light kiss. “See you soon...

"So, after all we went through in the arena, don't I even rate the truth from you?"

This is why i love Peeta so much  ♥ ♥

"There's a chance that the old Peeta. the one who loves you, is still inside. Trying to get back to you. Don't give up on him " -Primrose-

Peeta and I sit on the damp sand, facing away from each other, my right shoulder and hip pressed against his. After a while I rest my head against his shoulder. Feel his hand caress my hair. “Katniss,” he says softly, “it's no use pretending we don't know what the other one is trying to do.” No, I guess there isn't, but it's no fun discussing it, either. Well, not for us, anyway. The Capitol viewers will be glued to their sets so they don't miss one wretched word. “I don't know what kind of deal you think you've made with Haymitch, but you should know he made me promises as well.” Of course, I know this, too. He told Peeta they could keep me alive so that he wouldn't be suspicious. “So I think we can assume he was lying to one of us.” This gets my attention. A double deal. A double promise. With only Haymitch knowing which one is real. I raise my head, meet Peeta's eyes. “Why are you saying this now?” “Because I don't want you forgetting...

Catching Fire. “Don't go yet. Not until I fall asleep,” I say. Peeta sits on the side of the bed, warming my hand in both of his. “Almost thought you'd  changed your mind today. When you were late for dinner.” I'm foggy but I can guess what he means. With the fence going on and me showing up late  and the Peacekeepers waiting, he thought I'd made a run for it, maybe with Gale. “No, I'd have told you,” I say. I pull his hand up and lean my cheek against the back of it,  taking in the faint scent of cinnamon and dill from the breads he must have baked today. I  want to tell him about Twill and Bonnie and the uprising and the fantasy of District 13, but it's not safe to and I can feel myself slipping away, so I just get out one more sentence. “Stay with me.” As the tendrils of sleep syrup pull me down, I hear him whisper a word back, but I don't  quite catch it. Mockingjay “Always.” In the twilight of morphling, Peeta whispers the word an...

Peeta and I grow back together. There are still moments when he clutches the back of a chair and hangs on until the flashbacks are over. I wake screaming from nightmares of mutts and lost children. But his arms are there to comfort me. And eventually his lips. On the night I feel that thing again, the hunger that overtook me on the beach, I know this would have happened anyway. That what I need to survive is not Gale’s fire, kindled with rage and hatred. I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again. And only Peeta can give me that. So after, when he whispers,  “You love me. Real or not real?”  I tell him,  “Real.”

hal. 145 Dia bersandar di meja, jemarinya tterentang di atas urat kayu. Kutaruh kotak di antara kami. "Ingat?" tanyanya. "Disinilah kau menciumku." Ternyata morfin dalam dosis besar yang di berikan padanya setelah pencambukan tak cukup untuk menghapus kejadian itu dari kesadarannya. "Tak kusangka kau mengingatnya," kataku. "Harus mati dulu agar nisa melupakannya. Mungkin mati pun tak bisa lupa," kata Gale. "Mungkin aku akan jadi lelaki di 'Pohon Gantung'. Masih menunggu jawaban." Gale, yang tak pernah ku lihat menangis, tampak berkaca-kaca. Agar air matanya tak tumpah, aku berjalan ke depan dan menempelkan bibirku ke bibirnya. Kami merasakan panas, debu dan derita. Rasa yang mengejutkan untuk ciuman yang begitu lembut. Gale yang lebih dulu menjauh dan tersenyum getir padaku. "Aku tahu kau akan menciumku." "Bagaimana kau bisa tahu?" tanyaku. Bahkan aku sendiri tak tahu. "Karena aku sedang menderita,...